But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. (Luke 15: 20)
Our view of God—what we think and believe to be true of him—is the most essential element of our relationship with him. The image we have of God was formed in the early stages of life as we interacted with the adults around us. Experiences with our father and mother and authority figures such as grandparents, teachers, coaches, and spiritual leaders, helped us form conclusions about our heavenly Father. In many cases, these beliefs include misconceptions about the nature and character of God.
Distorted ideas and images from the past often prevent us from entering into the kind of relationship the Father created us to experience with him. A.W. Tozer, author of The Knowledge of the Holy, observed, “We tend by a secret law of the soul to move toward our mental image of God.” My childhood view of the Father was filled with unresolved conflict. I was unaware of the distortions because they were so deeply ingrained in me. Over time, I moved away from him and built an invisible barrier between us because of my tragic childhood.
My father left when I was three. I knew I had a father, but I felt abandoned and unloved by him. Throughout my childhood, I spent two weeks in the summer with Dad. His absence from my life impacted me in ways I never imagined. The most profound influence was how I viewed God. I read about his love but believed he loved me out of duty. I found it hard to comprehend he wanted a personal relationship with me. He felt so far away. The Bette Midler song “From a Distance” described my view of God. He was somewhere in the universe but wasn’t available to love, protect, or guide me.
In The Healing Presence, author Leanne Payne wrote, “As we know, it is important to have fathers who function as good, loving fathers, not only because they are the ones who on the natural plane affirm us as persons, but also because they are the ones who symbolize God the Father to us.” My soul was seared when my earthly father abandoned me and refused to take an active role in my life. The trauma prevented me from developing a proper view of God and left me unable to step into my role as his daughter. I believed the lie: my heavenly Father is like my earthly father, absent and uninterested in me for a long time.
I’ve learned wrong views and lies about God are common—no one escapes childhood without some sort of distortions about God. But people who come to know God as Father move out of their brokenness into healing. They hear and respond to his voice. They learn to trust him as a good father. And finally, they discover he values them and wants to engage in an intimate relationship with them.
Questions to ponder:
How is your relationship with God the Father?
How did your earthly father model the love of God throughout your childhood?
What ways didn’t he model God the Father’s love for you?
